Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of discipline will remove it far from him. Proverbs 22:15
Ah, we come to the NOT-Dr. Spock proverb. If you do not know who Dr. Spock is the first thing I should tell you is that he is not the pointy-eared science officer from the Star Trek series. He is a child psychologist from the 1960's who announced to the world through his writings that spanking a child was wrong. Unfortunately an entire generation decided that he was right (after all he is a psychologist!) and that God was wrong. If you are wondering the results of that choice, take a look at our society today. Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. This is a view that is also rejected by the vast majority of psychologists and educators today. We are told that we need to let children "express themselves." When we try to impose our views upon them - we are only warping them in our image. I can only tell you that when we add a biblical worldview to the practice of guiding and disciplining a child - people in the academic world tend to go ballistic. But the biblical fact is, well . . . fact. The Bible reprents mankind as fallen and ruined due to sin. That includes little ones fresh out of the womb. I know that it is very easy to look at little ones and think, "Oh, they are so cute - they're just little angels." The problem is that they are NOT little angels. The Biblical view is that they are little fools - and will remain that way unless we apply the rod of discipline in their lives. Children will basically be selfish and self-centered. The will have a tendency toward sin - and if left to themselves without discipline will become little tyrants. Some will howl with disapproval for this statement saying that not all children are this way. I've helped rear six children and would be the first to say that different children have different ways that they express their sinful nature - but every one of them needed discipline to keep from being fools. Some of my children were active in their rebellion - others were passive in how they disobeyed - but without a doubt they all disobeyed naturally. God's Word says that what we are after is their hearts. Note that we read that foolishness is bound up in a child's heart. We are not aiming for their bottoms - although that is where the discipline usually is administered. We are aiming for their hearts. We want them to see that they are fallen and that they need God. We want them to see that they are foolish and need the wisdom of God. We want them to see that they are sinful and need the forgiveness of God. We also want them to see that they are bound in sin and desperately need the deliverance of God. Finally, we need for them to see that they are fatally flawed and need the regeneration of God that comes with salvation. They need their "heart of stone" to be replaced at salvation with the heart of flesh that God promises in the new covenant. One reason we do this is because they must learn that discipline is the way of life. God will continue to discipline them as Hebrews 12:5-9 says. If we are His children - we WILL be disciplined. Thus we are to be trained by our parents early to learn to receive discipline and to learn from it. The rod of discipline is applied to help remove the foolishness from our hearts. As it does its work, we will grow in wisdom and understanding - and will learn to put away foolish things from our lives. There are some who will argue that the "rod" mentioned here is just words. But the word itself means a rod or stick - a club or the stick in a spear. I will not argue with those who say that at times God refers to the rod of His mouth. But when it comes to child training there are other passages in Proverbs that make it clear that we are to spank our children in disciplining them. This being said, I will also state clearly that over-spanking a child is abuse - and that God's Word refers to "LOVING" discipline that should be administered. Simply grabbing a child and swatting them is very ineffective. There should be instruction, clear boundaries, discipline, as well as reassuring love that is given after any kind of spanking that is given to a child. Our children need to know that we are not disciplining them because they are annoying us. We are discplining them so that they will become pliable in the hands of God - and so that they will learn not to embrace foolishness when it presents itself in their minds or through their friends and aquaintences. This is the kind of discipline that will train up that child. It is also the kind that will help them love their parents - and later the Lord for what He is doing. They will see that this is a very positive thing done out of love and always done with their ultimate best interests in mind. POSTSCRIPT: Recently, individuals have quoted articles from this section and stated that we teach child abuse at Calvary Chapel Jonesboro. To this I feel the need to respond. First, biblically, we are told that if we have a problem with our brother to go to our brother - not the internet - and confront our brother. To date, these individuals have yet to contact me to discuss these things. That should say volumes in itself. Second, we do not teach child abuse at our fellowship. This blog is an endeavor to teach what is in the Bible for the edification and upbuilding of God's people. Anyone who has been to our fellowship knows that in our classrooms we administer NO physical discipline. We correct with words and with "time outs" and eventually with a report to parents. From our nursery throughout every age group our people are instructed NEVER to administer physical discipline. We believe this right alone belongs to a parent. Even then we teach the following about any application of physical discipline. Discipline is about the heart of a child. Physical or corporal punishment is ONLY to be administered in a spirit of love for the child. Teaching and loving verbal correction is key - as is prayer for the child's eventual salvation in Jesus Christ. Any physical punishment administered due to anger or rage is out of line and wrong. The parent is to discipline the child with appropriate discipline - not abuse. In the end the child should be taught - and in every circumstance hugged, loved, and prayed with after any physical punishment to assure them of our love. The idea of a "beating" is completely out of step with what the Scriptures are teaching. Instead the idea of loving discipline is intended.
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The mouth of an adulteress is a deep pit; He who is cursed of the LORD will fall into it. Proverbs 22:14
Here is a take in Proverbs that turns conventional wisdom on its ear. It has to do with the adulteress - and with the man who seems to be having all the so-called success with the ladies. Whereas the world wants us to think that this ladies man has it made - the Word of God here in Proverbs has a much different take on his status. The adulteress, as we've learned in previous verses (5:3 and 7:5) catches men with her mouth. Her enticing words draws them in - and prevents them from seeing that they are not stepping into pure pleasure - but rather a trap. Here, in keeping with the previous warnings, is another statement that her mouth is a deep pit. Such pits where used for capturing animals and killing or making them slaves of the one who caught them. These pits were usually covered with camouflage to make their presence unknown until the animal stepped into them. By that time it was too late - they were either caught or dead. The same is true of the adulteress. She will hide her real intent with compliments and appeals to the ego of the fool she is trying to catch. He, being a fool, does not see the danger in another man's wife giving him praise. In the end, he falls for the deception and later falls into the trap. This is not new to us - but the fact that now for at least the third time a warning is given about this should make us very cautious when a woman other than our wife begins giving us compliments and starts stroking our ego. What I find shocking about this passage is the second statement made here. "He who is cursed of Jehovah will fall there." The reason that this is shocking is because we are told that one of the ways we can know that God has cursed someone - is that they are involved in sexual immorality - and even more so - that they are so involved in an adulterous affair. The world shows us the quintisential ladies man - and then says to us that this man is blessed. He has the ladies lining up for him. We are told that he can have any woman he wants - and that this is a sign of being blessed. The truth is much different - as it always is when it comes to the lies of the world and of Satan. Contrary to this worldly view - the man who is involved in sexual immorality with someone else's wife - is cursed of God. This is one of the ways that God brings His curse upon men. He allows them to enter into such foolish sexual sin. Think about this for a moment. Since this is true - then we should consider the sexual studs of the world - stupid. We should look at the playboys that are held up for honor and respect - men who are worthy only of shame and disgrace. We should see men like High Hefner not as models for us - but as morons. This are not men of honor - but examples of horror! The man who falls into sexual immorality is CURSED OF GOD! Wow! There is a turn of things for all of humanity. The wise man does not follow the world in its estimation of who is to be counted as worthy and who is worthless. These things are ultimately decided by God - Who has given us His estimation of things in His Word. If therefore the Word tells us those whom the world calls blessed are cursed - know that they are cursed indeed. Therefore the best thing we can do is reject the worldly ideas of manhood and a life worth living, and give ourselves to how our God views this world. The eyes of the LORD preserve knowledge, But He overthrows the words of the treacherous man. Proverbs 22:12
When you consider what kind of opposition the Bible has had throughout history, it is a wonder that any of it has been preserved to our day. Yet just as this proverb says, God had preserved His knowledge - as well as the writings of many other godly men - even though it has often been attempted to be destroyed by evil men. What is often lost to us are the words of the treacherous men who have lived throughout history. But even more than that we see that their very words themselves have been overthrown. The "who's who" list of evil men who have predicted the demise of God and His Word is so long that I would not have room to list them all in a post here - yet all their words have been overthrown. They have risen to predict that God would be destroyed - only to see Him remain and continue to change history through His Word and His church. How frustrating it has to be to see generation after generation continuing to be transformed by the gospel. How frustrating to see the very same gospel that they've hated for generations stand in another generation as their wicked philosophies were thrown on the trash heap of history. It is wonderful to see the stories of men like John Hus and John Wycliffe and how God preserved their works - especially their translations of the Bible. Both men saw the false church react strongly to their translation of the Scriptures - especially since their translations were trying to put God's Word into the language of the people. The false church killed John Hus - and were so disgusted with Wycliffe that over 40 years after his death dug up his bones and burned them and condemned him. But God preserved the writings and knowledge that these men gave to us - eventually using both of them as precursors to the Reformation. Rather than destroy the knowledge that they brought to us - God preserved it and used it to overthrow all the treacherous words and actions of the godless church that tried to overthrow the Word of God. Here is wisdom . . . realizing that God's Word will stand when everything else has faded away. As Peter said, 'All flesh is like grass, and all its flory like the flower of the grass. The grass withers, and the flower falls off, but the Word of the Lord endures forever." (1 Peter 1:24-25, NASB) He who loves purity of heart And whose speech is gracious, the king is his friend. Proverbs 22:11
What kind of person is the king's friend? That is in interesting question because those who have been in places of high authority know that it is often difficult to determine which ones are their friends - and which ones are befriending them for ulterior motives. When you look at the circle of those who surround the king or leader - among them you will always find the sycophants who are there to get what they can from the king. They offer their friendship . . . for a price. What the leader finds in the end is that this person was not really their friend. Unfortunately for the king, this is only learned when trouble comes - or when the king no longer can give the person what they want. So what kind of person is the king's friend? First we learn that he is a person who loves purity of heart. The term purity here was often used to describe the condition of being "clean" in Israel. This was a pretty strict definition - and thus it describes someone who is pure to a very high standard. When used of a person's heart, it referred to someone who was morally pure - as well as ethically pure. Since it refers to the condition of someone's heart - it speaks of someone who has wonderful morals, wonderful ethics, and whose thoughts and intents were as pure as the driven snow. The king gravitates to this kind of person because of that purity of heart. This is a person who would never be the king's friend for the ride. If he chose to befriend the king - it would be because he wanted to be the friend of the man - who just happened to be the king. That purity of heart would be such a comfort to someone who could give you so much. Most likely, this pure-hearted man would refuse the king's gifts and honors - choosing instead to simply be the king's friend - not the king's benefactor. It is interesting that among the many named as those who surrounded David, one man, Hushai the Archite, was simply known as the king's friend. He befriended David just because he wanted to be David's friend. Hushai the Archite was an interesting man. We only hear of him twice in Scripture. in 1 Chronicles he is simply referred to as the king's friend. The other place we learn of him is in 2 Samuel 15-17. We see him meeting David as David reaches the top of the Mount of Olives after David has had to leave the throne due to being deposed by his son, Absalom. He arrives with his coat torn and with dust on his head. Here was a friend who stuck with David in the very worst of times. Sometimes the king will only know his true friends when he is deposed. Hushai was one of those friends who did not care whether David was king or not - he was still his friend. But when David faced such horrific circumstances, Hushai was there grieving with him through it all. But Hushai's friendship went far deeper - and endured even more challenges. David asked him to return to the city and act as Absalom's servant - to thwart the counsel of Ahithophel. This was dangerous to say the least, because as soon as Absalom sees him - he notes that this was his father's friend. He even chides him for being a poor friend, turning on David in his hour of need. At that moment Absalom could have had Hushai killed or imprisoned. But Hushai went - and served David well. He did thwart the counsel of Ahithophel - and later alerted David to get over the Jordan for safety even if they possilby did follow Ahithophel's advice. Here was a true friend, willing to risk his life to protect his friend. The other factor in being the king's friend was that you needed to have speech that was gracious. There are times when I wish we would translate Hebraisms directly - because I think they paint a much more powerful picture for us. The Hebraism here literally says, "and who has grace on his lips." What a great picture this paints of how this man speaks. He speaks the truth - but does so with plenty of grace. That is the kind of friend the king needs. He needs someone who will tell him the truth - but will do so with much grace as he does so. Too many around the king simply tell him what he wants to hear. They become suck-ups who are too busy trying to woo the king's favor. But a true friend will both speak the truth to us - but will also speak with much grace in what he or she says. Here is the friend of the king - with a pure heart and with grace on his lips. As we look at him closer, we should see here not just a fitting friend for the king, but in all honesty - a fitting friend for anyone! This description fits what we should want in a friend period. May God be gracious to us and allow us to find such a friend in our lifetime. If we do find one - we should thank God for them - and - be such a friend to them as well. Drive out the scoffer, and contention will go out, Even strife and dishonor will cease. Proverbs 22:10
How do you get rid of strife and contention in a group? That is what God wants us to be instructed in today in Proverbs. He is about to tell us about the horrific fellow known as the "scoffer." Wherever this man is - there is trouble and strife about to break loose. When we learn how to identify and rid ourselves of him and his ilk, we will find that the dishonor and disunity will go away as well. The word scoffer refers to someone who loves to mock, scorn, deride with great contempt to anyone but himself. The scoffer loves to express his utter contempt with someone with whom he disagrees. He knows nothing of positive criticism - he only knows of mocking and seeking to scorn his enemies. It is not enough for him to merely disagree - he must do it in the most disagreeable way possible! He knows only how to show complete and absolute contempt toward those he finds in his philosophical crosshairs. A wise man knows that mocking his detractors will usually yield him some serious enemies. Very rarely does this tactic yield converts to his way of thinking. Heaping a mocking shame and disgrace on others is not a positive way to communicate a message which you desire to use to change someone's mind and thinking. But that is what the scoffer excells at in life. As a result when he comes around you will also find contention, strife, and dishonor. He will use his words to strike up fights among people. He loves to fight - and loves to accelerate an argument to the point of intense strife. He also loves to see dishonor come to his opponents. He cares little what happens to the organization in which he is wreaking his havoc. He only cares for his own ungodly thoughts and desires. The more damage he can render to his opponents - the better he sees the outcome of his actions. There is one response to such a man - get him out! Scripture says that we are to "drive out" this kind of man. Too often we want to try to win him over to our way of thinking. That is NOT going to happen - because he is un-winnable while he is a scoffer. The New Testament tells us to reject a factious man after a warning. We are not to have a three strikes policy with such dangerous men. Get their contention-stimulating behavior and conversation thrown out of the assembly of God's people. This man knows nothing about how to walk in unity with others. He only airs his own opinions and contentious thoughts. He cares nothing for those of others. The best thing we can offer him - is the way out. This may sound hard - but when dealing with a scoffer, you are not dealing with someone who can be won over. Therefore the best thing to do is to follow the godly advice of Solomon - drive him out! He who is generous will be blessed, For he gives some of his food to the poor. Proverbs 22:9
Who would have thought that being wise involved the character trait of generosity and how we react to the poor? Yet that is exactly what we are dealing with today with the proverb of the day. The one who is generous will be blessed. The idea for generosity here is one that comes from the Hebraism. The actual phrase is that this one has a good eye. In Hebrew, to have a good eye is to be someone who is kind and generous. It meant that you looked with kindness on others. It was the picture of a man who was good, gracious, kind, and generous. A man with a bad eye would be one who is stingy and selfish. He would be seen as an evil, ungodly man. Jesus used these same Hebraisms when He said, "The eye is the lamp of your body; when your eye is clear, your whole body also is full of light; but when it is bad, your body also is full of darkness. Then watch out that the light in you is not darkness." (Luke 11:34-35, NASB) In the same way Jesus was stating that if our eye is selfish and stingy - if we are tight-fisted and unwilling to give to others - it will yield a darkness in us. We will be selfish, ungrateful, and unkind men. But if our eye is good - it shows that we are gracious and kind as well. The man here with the good eye - he is generous and blessed. This is seen by the fact that he gives some of his food to the poor. This gracious and good man is concerned about those less fortunate than himself. Thus he takes his own food and gives some of it to the one poorer than himself - to bless them. This is something that is commended from Old to New Testaments. As early as Exodus and Deuteronomy God told Israel not to forget the poor. In Deuteronomy 15:7 we read the following admonition by God - that sounds like a rewriting of this proverb. "If there is a poor man with you, one of your brothers, in any of your towns in your land which the LORD your God is giving you, you shall not harden your heart, nor close your hand from your poor brother;but you shall freely open your hand to him, and shall generously lend him sufficient for his need in whatever he lacks." But there are not only commands to remember the poor, but also promises of blessing to those who do. Proverbs 19:17 reminds us that those who are gracious to the poor lend to the Lord - and God promises to reward those who do so for their good deeds. We even find in the New Testament at the Jerusalem Council that Paul is urged to remember the poor - which he states is the very thing he wanted to do. God wants so show His own gracious hand through how He leads His own people to be generous as well. That is why we want to be gracious and kind towards the poor. It is absolutely our duty - but it is also an important way that the world around us can see the character and love of our God as He works through us. He who sows iniquity will reap vanity, And the rod of his fury will perish. Proverbs 22:8
The other day something truly amazing happened. I had planted a batch of tomato seeds, and after a couple of months I went out and harvested a whole bucket full of orages from the vines that grew there. Now if you are someone who is even the least bit familiar with agriculture, you know that this last statement was false. If I planted tomato seeds into the ground - the only thing I will harvest from them is tomatos. There is an unbending principle at work here - whatever you sow is what you will reap. That principle is what is at the core of what is taught in today's proverb. Here we have a man who is sowing iniquity. The word used here is a pretty tough word. It means unrighteousness, injustice, or wrong. This doesn't sound too bad until you begin to look a little deeper into the word and its usage. It is used to describe violent injustice and outright wickedness. Keil and Delitasch state that this word means, "unsympthizing tyranny, cruel misconduct toward a neighbor." It describes the actions of one who wants the person who feels his wrong to feel the fury of his anger. The second half of this proverb makes that clear. The iniquity that he is sowing is manifest in the "rod of his fury," which is felt by those unfortunate enough to be his victims. These kind of actions are usually those of a despotic king - or a person who is misusing their authority. When one sows like this - they are going to reap vanity. The word for vanity here is the Hebrew word "aven" which means emptiness or nothingness. It can also mean sorrow, trouble, evil, or mischief. The idea here is that this despotic individual thinks he is going to reap the power of his authority - when in reality he is going to reap nothingness. The thought behind this nothingness is that of utter destruction. We've watched as this has happened right before our eyes. Saddam Hussein thought he was building an empire - but what he received in the end was a rude awaking in a hole - and the end of a hangman's noose. The Word of God warns in Galatians 6:7 that God will not be mocked - whatever a man sows he shall also reap. If he sows to the flesh, as he is here, he will from the flesh reap corruption. No one can outrun the hand of God and the principles upon which the Lord has founded this world. The wicked man thinks that the rod of his fury will make others bow down and obey him. He rules only with fear - and trusts that fear alone will bring him the results that he desires. But the proverb tells us that this man - after all his furious tiraids - will perish. All his fury will do for him is ensure that his place in history is set as a terrible ruler or leader. His memory will not be blessed - men will curse it and use it as a byword. They will remember him not as a wise man - but as a fool. There lies the man who thought he could rule the world through wickedness and through fear. No one fears him now - and what awaits him is the utter vanity for which he worked. Having spent his life living for himself and for his own arrogant pursuits - he will die facing the fury of the One before Whom he will stand and give an account for his actions. Having rejected His love and His offer of mercy and grace through Jesus Christ, unfortunately for him, the fury of God will never cease. The rich rules over the poor, And the borrower becomes the lender's slave.
Proverbs 22:7 Proverbs is an interesting book in that it is presenting wisdom to us. But as we read it there are times when we struggle with what is being said. Here we read about how the rich rules over the poor - and we wonder about the wisdom of this statement. But before we make the fatal mistake of questioning an all-wise God, let's take a moment to look at this proverb without the liability of the class warfare that has too often been used to color our thinking about such things. The rich does rule over the poor. This is too the advantage of both if they are wise in how they conduct themselves. The rich often become that way because they have learned how to manage things and deal with them so that they are profitable. These sound like the kind of skills needed to be a leader. Solomon is saying that this is the case - that the ones who rule over others are usually those who have worked hard to accomplish something. Ones who have used their abilities to manage and accumulate wealth and influence. that influence naturally puts them in a position to exercise even greater influence over a larger and larger number of people. For those who are offended that the Bible speaks of the rich ruling over the poor also need to consider the things the Bible says to protect the poor. God has said numerous things to make it clear that He bring judgment upon the man who oppresses the poor. He warns the rich again and again not to put their hope in riches. He also warns about how riches can deceive a man and destroy him if he decides to pursue wealth about pursuing the things of God. God may say that the rich rules over the poor - but He does not in any way condone the rich abusing the poor. In fact, God promises that He will rise up to defend the poor and needy. The second thing we learn from this passage is the dangers and evils of living on borrowed money. We learn that the borrower becomes the lender's slave. When I read this statement I remember the rendition of a Disney song that goes, "I owe, I owe, so off to work I go." The borrower owns the lender - or at least he owns whatever was purchased with loans until they are completely paid off. Things become worse for the one who owes an exorbitant amount to the lender. More and more interest is charged the larger the amount - and the worker suddenly is working to pay off the interest without even touching the loan amount itself. Then the borrower becomes the lender's slave. He will never get out of debt and spends a lifetime paying for something he will never own. When I read this particular proverb I fear for our nation. We are no longer a lender nation - but a debtor one. Our leadership on both sides of the aisle have mortgaged our future trying to buy our votes. The sick reality of our situation is that they've bought our votes promising things they've bought with our money as they enact more and more confiscatory tax policies. Thus we've been bought using our own money - and those who have used it have done so to further enslave us to government programs and promises to save us. In the end, this house of cards will come crashing to the ground. Our greed to become rich with loans will come home to roost as our currency and our economy become worthless. The wise man does not seek riches through becoming a lender's slave. Instead he uses industry, sacrifice, and saving to purchase what he wants - and greater wisdom to have what he has saved be used to increase his ability to earn more. And if he is truly wise, he will use the wealth God has given him the ability to earn to bless others. He will not allow riches to use him, he will use riches to bring glory to God. Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
Here is probably one of the most well known proverbs that there is. It has to deal with how to rear a child. Too often it is quoted more like, raise up a child and church - and he won't rebel or depart from going to church or doing the church thing. Many a devastated parent reads this verse and wonders why little Johnny doesn't go to church any longer - or want anything to do with the Lord. Let's take a close look at this verse to see what is DOES say and what is DOES NOT say to us as we seek to rear our children for the Lord. The word train is very important to know here - as we see that the "training" of the child in the way he should go is imperative to the blessing of him not departing from that way when he is old. This word is the Hebrew word, "chanak" which means to train or to dedicate. The root word for "chanak" means to narrow something - thus to initiate, discipline, or train it to that narrow path. Ah, here we begin to see what God is saying to us about child training. We are to narrow the child's way - by training and instruction - so that the child's way conforms itself to God's way. This narrowing had to do with the opening of a path. It was a constricting of that opening so that someone went a specific way as they sought to enter the path before them. Let's take a moment and talk about how this is applied to child training. When we talk about "narrowing" a child's way - we are talking about discipline. When they are little it means instructing - but also if necessary corporal punishment (spanking if you will) in order to train the child that there are certain things you just do not do. If you choose to do these things there will be punishment. It means we MUST correct our children when they act out in a way that is contrary to God's way. When we refuse to do this - we are not helping our child find his way - we are confusing them. Study after study has shown that children desire boundaries - and that they will test the ones that are imposed to see if they are truly boundaries or not. Create godly boundaries for a child (oh, and by the way, live by them yourself as well) and a child will have a great deal of stability in his or her life. In many ways, to rear a child in this way is simply to prepare him for a life of discipleship later. Jesus calls us to "Make disciples of all the nations." This means our own children as well. When we teach them that disicpline is the "way of life," we prepare them for the reality that reward and punishment - really are the way of life. They will face such things all the remainder of their days. It is best to begin young teaching them such things - and showing them through our discipline that there are very real consequences for actions outside of the Scriptures. Too many see child reading in this permission society as letting a child find his own way in the world without the parents doing much to get in his way. This is a sure way to lose a child - to have them follow after their own sinful nature and ruin themselves by indulging their flesh and walking in an ungodly path. Adam Clarke spoke of this passage as teaching a child how to narrow the opening of his path so that he was directed in God's way, no matter what chioce he had to make. Clarke spoke of how we needed to show the child the path - instruct him on the duties, dangers, and blessings of the path - and then do all we can do guide the child so that he takes God's path. Thus when a child faces the reality of life in this world - and the choices that are placed before Him - then that child will be able to reason from the Scriptures and know how to conduct himself or herself in the world. We are told to train up this child in the "way" he should go. Way is our old Hebrew friend, "derek" and it means a path, a way - and was probably the word used most often to speak of choices someone would make that would lead to a lifestyle - or way of living. Note here that we are to train up this child to the lifestyle and way - the path of life in which he "SHOULD" go. Here we face a very serious problem when we present this to the average worldling of today. A way in which someone "should go" indicates that one way is superior to another - something this world finds anathema to their worldview. They think all lifestyles and all paths are the same. Thus to say a child has a way he "should go" rather than to just let the child find his own way and follow his own heart until he knows his own path - that is nothing more than legalism and a domineering way of rearing a child. The worldling parent is not supposed to care if the child goes in a way that is not acceptable to the parent. The child will find his own way - and besides, it is the height of arrogance to think we KNOW how someone should go! The Bible has a much different view here. God gives us a Law that guides us into the right way and away from the wrong way. There are certain moral choices that are soundly right - and others that are horribly wrong. There are choices in the area of sexuality that are the right way to live - and others that are wrong (not just an alternate lifestyle - just wrong). Taking the time to teach a child these ways - and guide them into these paths - that is what child training is all about. There is a right way - God's way - and that is how we are to teach our children to walk. We are to train them that right way - and also to instruct them on the consequences of walking in the wrong way. We should show them, not just God's instructions, but also God's judgments on certain ways of living and certain choices that they might make. Then there is the promise. It is a bold promise. Even when he is old he will not depart from it. As the child grows older - with instruction, discipline, warnings, encouragements and everything else a parent should use to teach him - that child will not depart from God's way. The example of the parent is also vital here because we teach not just with words - but with our actions as well. When they see these things - hear these things - watch these things modeled before them - then then will know the way in which to walk. This proverb involves so much more than just taking a child to church and youth group. It involves serious child training using God's Word as our blueprint. It involves selling out on how we live ourselves and laboring to teach our children God's Word on morals and meaning. We labor - striving to show them God's way - striving to help them see the forks in the road - but also the consequences of taking the wrong turn there. These are the things that matter if we are to be successful in rearing children for the Lord. If we instruct and lead in a way that narrows their choices into the wise and godly way - we can be assured that when they grow old, they will not depart from the way in which they were instructed. It is a promise that God's way - taught in God's way - modeled in God's way - will provide results as a child chooses His way as His own way in life. POSTSCRIPT: Recently, individuals have quoted articles from this section and stated that we teach child abuse at Calvary Chapel Jonesboro. To this I feel the need to respond. First, biblically, we are told that if we have a problem with our brother to go to our brother - not the internet - and confront our brother. To date, these individuals have yet to contact me to discuss these things. That should say volumes in itself. Second, we do not teach child abuse at our fellowship. This blog is an endeavor to teach what is in the Bible for the edification and upbuilding of God's people. Anyone who has been to our fellowship knows that in our classrooms we administer NO physical discipline. We correct with words and with "time outs" and eventually with a report to parents. From our nursery throughout every age group our people are instructed NEVER to administer physical discipline. We believe this right alone belongs to a parent. Even then we teach the following about any application of physical discipline. Discipline is about the heart of a child. Physical or corporal punishment is ONLY to be administered in a spirit of love for the child. Teaching and loving verbal correction is key - as is prayer for the child's eventual salvation in Jesus Christ. Any physical punishment administered due to anger or rage is out of line and wrong. The parent is to discipline the child with appropriate discipline - not abuse. In the end the child should be taught - and in every circumstance hugged, loved, and prayed with after any physical punishment to assure them of our love. The idea of a "beating" is completely out of step with what the Scriptures are teaching. Instead the idea of loving discipline is intended. Thorns and snares are in the way of the perverse; He who guards himself will be far from them. Proverbs 22:5
Perversity . . . why is it wise to avoid being someone who is perverse? That is the subject of today's proverb of the day. The perverse man is the crooked man. This word is used to describe someone who is morally, religiously, and socially given to perversion. We read elsewhere in Proverbs 11:20 that God hates the perverse. So this kind of lifestyle is one that we want to avoid at all costs. God says that thorns and snares are in the way of the perverse. It is interesting that the perverse man thinks that everything is fine with him and with his lifestyle. He may even feel that he will get ahead if he twists a few things here and there. But the truth is that he is navigating a way that is full of thorns and snares. We see this best when a banker or businessman is finally caught after being morally bankrupt. The day comes when he is eventually caught in one of the snares. The day comes when he faces the cost of walking through thorns. The scrapes begin to add up and the scars make his skin ugly over time. The snare that catches him trips him up all at once - and usually comes with a humiliating set of consequences. What are we to do about these things? Scripture tells us that we need to "guard" ourselves from them. The word "guard" here is our old friend "shamar" and means to be watchful and careful. It means to set up a watch like a bodyguard over our lives. We should have signs set up in our lives that say, "beware, perversity is near" and then avoid those paths and choices like we would the plague itself! This is the wise and circumspect choice. This is the way to avoid thorns and snares. This is the way to walk a life that will be blessed with protection here and now - and great reward in the end. |
Proverb a DayEach day, we'll take a look at a verse from the chapter of Proverbs for the day. Our hope is to gain wisdom each day - and from that wisdom - to have understanding to make godly decisions in the throes of everyday life. Thank you for visiting our website! Everything on this site is offered for free. If, however, you would like to make a donation to help pay for its continued presence on the internet, you can do that by clicking here. The only thing we ask is that you give first to the local church you attend. Thank you!
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